Help Jamesphie Escape from his Adversaries: The Interactive Expedition

KoolKid infects Jamesphie's router with uncool content. What should you do?
A. Run home.

B. Kill Koolkid for the umpteenth time.

C. Describe the disputation as "uncool".

D. do the chicken dance

Jamesphie is being tormented by the people on his uncool list. What should you do?
A. Show them how Coolbombs work and exterminate them.

B. Get the hell out of there with Jamesphie.

C. "Nice music you got goin' there, guys. I prefer Selwyn, though. Don't you think he's cool?"

D. Whatever. Ignore them amicably and rescue Jamesphie.

Jamesphie has mysteriously disappeared, and the only thing left is a ransom note from KoolKid. What should you do?
A. Hunt KoolKid down.

B. cry

C. commit stuicide

D. meh